Is it good to be a pushover?

Photo by Alena Darmel on

Sometimes, I get exasperated with my older sister for being such a pushover with her daughter who despite her regular financial assistance, is most of the time disrespectful of her, raising her voice on the phone when her mother calls her out. My sister even asks me to reprimand her daughter as her daughter is a little bit afraid to mess around with me. When she has the power to call the shots and still is afraid to reprimand her daughter, what do I call my sister?

My sistser’s husband is also temperamental and he verbally abuses my sister when she makes mistakes. And yet, when he makes a mistake like forgetting about the postdated checks he issued that they have to pay the penalty for doing so, she does not retaliate and verbally abuse him too. I tell her to take advantage of the situation to make him know how it feels. There are other examples I can’t mention anymore, but which only goes to show that she let people walk all over her.

Another friend, can’t spot people who were taking advantage of her since she’s on the well-off side. Since she was the treasurer of the chapel, she allowed some of the workers to slack off when she’s supervising chapel projects, or even let them cheat her of hardware materials as she lets them buy it themselves without counter checking the receipts and the items. As the auditor, I realized there are some items missing and she doesn’t mind. She even brings them food. She wasn’t only lenient with the chapel’s money but with her own. Carpenters take so long repairing her house and she it seemed like she’s clueless that they were just trying to stretch out the time to get paid more.

And it is not just carpenters taking advantage of her but a number of friends and neighbors asking material things, favors and treats which she willingly obliged. Was that generosity or what?

And yet, people usually refer to these types of personalities as the”good” guys, or in our language, as “mabait” who are easy to get along with. And people who won’t allow other people to get away with wrongdoings as “strict” and difficult.

I don’t know. When you stand up for the truth, when you save the institution you work for, some money because you were vigilant, when you don’t allow other people to abuse others or discipline your children with tough love, is that not good?

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